Sarai syndrome. 

Waiting for something for years. So many years. The more you think about it, it all becomes tears. You’ve fought long and hard to be ok. Long and hard to believe the truth. The lies scream loudly and talk holding with no proof. The Sarai syndrome has got you again. Don’t forget you’re on your way to the promise land. Bumps and bruises will all occur. Many struggles and pain you will have to endure. Only the grace of God will get you through. Only your love for him can follow through. Your love for him will draw you near. Your love for him will be so clear. He will make a way where there is no way. Yet here you are again staring at a brick wall. You know the promise is true but it takes a long time to see. It’s not on your time but on Gods and only then will you see. You laugh, you get mad, you don’t understand. You’re frustrated , tired, weary for all the pain. Emotional, mental, spiritual, it’s all a drain. The only one to pull you through gave you a promise to hold onto. The promise keeps you going when you feel like giving up and throwing it all away. Then you remember there’s brighter days coming. The promise must come true. You’re not dead yet so there is still so much for you. So much for you to discover, experience, and enjoy. The hard times only make you stronger, better. They bring you close to God and his glory. He’s not afraid of your mess. He’s not afraid of your dirty. Bring it to him to cleanse you off and make you white as snow. Believe it will get better. Believe your heart will grow. Your roots will grow deeper and deeper rooted in him. Oh now wait the Sarai syndrome starts to begin. You spiral down all once again. Sinning seems likes it’s winning until you realize who you are again. You are chosen, you are destined, you are created to do great things. Your promise will change the world and you are raging within. You want to see what lies ahead and try to live in the now. You wonder how can you make it another day without the one thing you long for. Allow Christ to comfort your soul. Right before during and after the Sarai syndrome unfolds.